bumper stickers are slabbered all over the back of the
in an apparent attempt to educate the bypassers that
they’ve run a marathon, hiked mountains,
own dogs, birthed two kids, biked the Pacific Highway,
kayaked the Amazon River, visited Vermont, likes BBQ,
believes in peace for all, spends lots of time in Colorado,
and once voted for George McGovern.
as i am driving 70 mph on the highway and i figure
the only reason these folks have all of the stickers
is so that i become fascinated with their intriguing
lifestyle and personalities; i roll down my window:
“HEY!” i honk the horn several times. “HEY YOU!”
they finally respond by rolling down their window.
“Yes?” they responded all too quietly for driving at
70 mph. “GO FUCK YOURSELF WITH YOUR
STUPID FUCKING BUMPER STICKERS YOU
I hope their kids heard me.